Breaking the Cycle

The turning point for Courtney was watching her one-year-old daughter wave goodbye as her mom was driven away in the backseat of a police car. “I thought, ‘Something has got to change,’” Courtney says. Courtney had been arrested for dealing methamphetamine to an undercover informant while her daughter, Olivia, was with her.

But her darkest moment was a clear sign from God. She recalls crying out just a few days before her arrest: “God, please. I do not want to do this anymore. Help me.” Courtney had tried turning her life around before, including when her oldest child was born and then taken away by Child Protective Services when it was discovered she had used meth while pregnant. “I remember when they took my son from me and my dad called me and said, ‘How could you,’” she says. “And that’s what I was thinking on the way to jail, ‘How could you.’ Putting my daughter in that situation. That was going through my mind.”

Courtney came to Boise Rescue Mission immediately after she was released from jail and soon entered the City Light program. She’s been clean for the past three years.

“That day truly saved my life,” she says. It also saved Olivia’s. Courtney remembers never leaving the house when she was using meth. She never took Olivia to the park, but would stay up all night, peering out the windows in paranoia.“ Who wants that kind of life? Your life is being wasted away. And it wasn’t a good life for my daughter,” she says. “I’m breaking the cycle.”

Olivia has been living with her mom at City Lights for the majority of the program. She loves the Rescue Mission and is thriving. Courtney also has fostered healthy relationships with her other two children now that she’s turned her life around. “I don’t ever think about using or going back to that lifestyle, because I see my kids and I have a great relationship with them now and with my family,” she says. “This life is so much better than that old life and I don’t ever want to go back.”